Hidden Meanings

Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:



It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at least three thousand years old!

The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss the meaning of the markings.

The President of the society pointed to first drawing and said: "This is a woman. We can see these people held women in high esteem. You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a donkey, so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil.
The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them."



Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means that if a famine hit the earth and food didn't grow, they seek food from the sea. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews.

The audience applauded enthusiastically.

Then a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said, "Idiots, Hebrew is read from right to left...... It says: 'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Woman'

Noah Grey

This is one of the coolest photographers / artists I've seen... here are a couple of my favorite pictures

My Father

I just finished watching Tim Burton's "Big Fish". *sniff*

My father is so very similar. His stories aren't as elaborate or well told, but repetitious nonetheless. I've done exactly what his son had done. I've become irritated, finished his stories or jokes for him and say things in exasperation like, "Yes, I've heard that story two thousand six hundred and twenty-three times now".

Well I still love you dad. I'd hate myself if I didn't tell you I loved you everytime we talked. I'd miss you terribly if something did ever happen to you. I just hope that you know we all still love you even in our disgusted looks and embarrasment of your actions. I know you won't change, and at this point I don't think I'd want you to. I just hope someday when I have children that I can share those stories of you, and pass on the knowledge and "wisdom" that I've learned from you. I love you dad.

Now I just have to think of something extra special for him on Father's day (only 2 weeks away!)

Ack Poisonous!!

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From Go-Quiz.com

Spaghetti

A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years.

One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.

If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back.

He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.

Honey, she said, "You received a very strange post card today."

"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said.

The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white and fainted.

On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."

Ice Cream

Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan!
You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind!

What is your Icecream Flavour?
Find out at Go Quiz

Time Flies

Mmmmmm Chocolate

Hoppin' Blaupunkt Speakers

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Senior personal ads

Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida newspapers:
(Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY:
Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW:
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE:
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES?
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES:
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION:
Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.